Intimacy Coaching for Couples, in Melbourne and Online
Most of us were never taught how to do relationships. We got the Disney version: the big wedding, the kiss, then "happily ever after," with none of the real skills for what comes after the credits roll.
Then we add the sitcoms that showed dysfunctional relationships and crossed wires for cheap laughs. The love songs made longing and heartbreak sound like the whole point. And plenty of us grew up watching our parents keep affection private and big feelings behind closed doors.
So of course intimacy can feel like a language no one ever taught you. The good news is that it's exactly that, a language, and it can be learned. And learning it together is where the joy and exploration begins.
So let's build real relationship and sex skills, the ones that last you a lifetime. Desire coming back to life, conversations that pull you closer instead of pushing you apart, and touch, play and pleasure you get to explore together rather than perform. It's as much about growing something genuinely good and exciting between you as it is about easing what hurts. This work is somatic, experiential and trauma informed. Body based, not just talk.
What brings you here?
We start with what you both actually want. That might be:
finding your way back to desire, and understanding each other's core desires
fighting less and repairing faster
rebuilding trust and safety
growing into your shared erotic potential, with more closeness, adventure and pleasure
The Somatica Method I trained in is experiential, so we don't just talk, we practise. Sessions combine real conversation with embodied practice, because emotional and erotic intimacy are learnable skills, and pleasure, not pressure, is the fastest way to build them.
It's also a space to get curious together. We can talk through kink, ethical non-monogamy or open relationships, as something to explore and understand for yourselves, never something I arrange. Your desire isn't a problem to solve here.
Couples and individual sessions, side by side
Unlike most people working with couples, I start with individual sessions before we move into couples sessions. Each of you gets your own space for what's hard to say in front of your partner, a chance to focus on yourself rather than on them, and to see the part you play in the dynamic. Often that's what shifts things the most.
When we all feel ready, we come together and start mixing the couples work with the individual, until we've built a space where it genuinely feels safe enough to say and do anything in front of your partner. Sometimes that's one session each, sometimes it's a longer healing journey for both of you. Read more about how I work individually on the Working with Women and Working with Men pages.
Individual sessions run 60 minutes and couples sessions run 90 minutes, online or in person. We move at a pace that works for both of you, and I hold the space so each of you can speak and be heard.
Somatic Couples Coaching
You might be in a relationship that has quietly become sexless, or one where your desire is mismatched and the gap has become the painful, unspoken thing between you. You might keep landing in the same argument, with resentment stacking up until closeness feels easier to avoid. This is often where I come in, as a kind of translator between you.
A lot of what runs the show isn't really about sex. It's attachment, the patterns you each learned long before you met, and often trauma carried by one or both of you. None of it means something is wrong with you. Part of the work is healing those attachment wounds side by side, so it feels safer to reach for each other again.
It usually takes two to tango, though I've seen plenty of people dancing with brooms instead of each other, and threes finding their own rhythm too. However many of you there are, the dynamic is something you make together, which is why it's rarely one person who needs fixing. We work on everyone's skills: each of you finding your own boundaries and voice, turning a little curiosity back on yourselves, and learning to really see each other's point of view.
Tantra for Couples: Rituals and Learning to Massage Each Other
Maybe nothing is wrong at all. You love each other, and you want to feel more: more presence, more sensation, more of that early aliveness that busy life has quietened. Or maybe touch between you has become routine, a quick means to an end, and you want to slow it right down and rediscover each other. Tantric work for couples is a way back into that, into your bodies and into a shared pleasure that belongs to the two of you.
In these sessions I guide you both through connection rituals and teach you how to give each other massage, so the skills stay with you long after you leave. Think of it as part private couples massage class and part intimacy ritual, something you learn together and can keep coming back to at home. This is tantric work, but you do not need any experience with tantra to begin. This is hands-on for the two of you, not for me: I stay clothed and guide throughout, and the touch is between you and your partner, never with me. My role is to slow you down, show you what's possible, and help you feel safe enough to be fully present with each other.
We always begin clothed, we talk first, and we agree consent and boundaries together before anything else. From there it becomes a full-body experience of learning to give and receive with each other, unhurried, with nothing to prove and nowhere to rush to. Genital and whole-body touch can be part of it, but never the point. The aim is to let that sexual energy move through your whole bodies, not just your genitals, and to bring what you learn home with you.
“We are finding a lot of value in our learnings. Already put a lot of it into practice… it’s all definitely landing really well and it feels like we have been transformed in the best ways. Thank you so so much, Ami!”
This is what's coming
Alongside the one-to-one work, I'm building a set of online courses, group coaching, workshops and intensives for couples. On-demand practices you can do together in your own time, and live group experiences to learn, play and grow alongside other couples.
They're on their way. You can see more on the Workshops and Intensives page, and if there's something you'd love to explore, tell me below and join the newsletter so you're first to know when the doors open.
Getting started
Not sure yet? That's completely fine. A lot of couples who reach out don't have a clear label for what's going on, you just know something needs to change. You don't need to agree on the problem before you talk to me.
The first step is always a free 20–30 minute call. It works both ways, a relaxed chance for us both to feel out the fit before anything is booked. You can ask me anything, and if someone in my network would be a better match for you, I'll gladly point you their way.
Bodywork, rituals and coaching in-person sessions run in Melbourne. Coaching can also be online, and I work with clients around the world, across Australian, Asian and North American time zones.